We Say That We Want It, But Why Don't Our Actions Reflect It?

Something that just hit me pretty recently (actually like 5 minutes ago), was the realization about myself that in my prayer time, I'll pray, "Lord, I want to know You more, I want to be pure, holy, and I want all that I do to reflect You..." and so on, yet when I have free time to be in the Word, to pray, to simply open myself up to experience Him, rather than do any of those things, I do "useless" things like go on Facebook, text, or other stuff that probably isn't very worthwhile. This kind of reminds me what I wrote about in my last blog about the inward battle we experience: doing things we don't want to do and not doing the things that we want to do.

Some may say that being in the Word, prayer, experiencing God comes by discipline. Some may say it comes by discipline alone. But if we lived our lives, if we based our relationship with God off of solely discipline, then it wouldn't be much of a relationship, would it? It's so much more than that. Yeah, discipline's good, and important... but even more than that, I pray that I'd get into the Word, spend my free time in prayer, opening myself up to experiencing Him in all that I do, out of a love for Him. It definitely seems weird to pray that: "Lord, I want to want You..." but it's a legitimate prayer. We can't love God without God.

The fortunate thing is that even though we're not perfect, God's grace covers us, and He sees us as if we are. And that's the thing that's hard for most if not all of us to understand. We need to see ourselves as He does, see the world as He does... and that's when things will start changing around us.